The easy way I started a public blog (even at 38 and after struggling for years)
For the longest time I've wanted to contribute publicly - to share my thoughts and ideas, to receive feedback and to engage in discussion.
Maybe I want to push myself to make the most of what little brains I have or maybe I hope to help someone in some small way or maybe I just want to leave some trace of myself, a reminder of what I was about, breadcrumbs for people to find, evidence I existed at all.
I've started a few blogs over the years, but I just couldn't get going with any kind of gusto. It's always been such a bore / chore - something I had to force myself to do.
I struggled to find things to say and when I did have something to say I didn't think it was worth sharing.
Even the personal journal (I'll post about how and why I started it and its impact on me) I began after my mum's passing in 2019 failed to provide a springboard for me to take what I figured was a natural next step.
I was utterly stifled, like a player sent off watching on miserably from the sidelines.
Frustration consumed me. My self-esteem suffered. And I could feel myself tighten up whenever my inaction crossed my mind.
"Why can't I just do this thing?"
And then... all of a sudden...
Everything changed - sweet release. (Exhale)
In this post I'll share how the biggest setback of my professional career helped to change my perspective on contributing and flooded my brain with the creative energy and enthusiasm to do it. And all at the tender age of 38.
"The fool speaks, the wise man listens." or so I thought
"You've got to be an expert to contribute something meaningful to a discussion, amirite???"
I flit between interests and so, unfortunately, I don't think I'm an expert at anything - even if I have spent 10,000 hours watching football with my mates...
So what to do?
I'm not an authority on anything, I don't want to pick just one interest to focus on and if I write about every whim that takes my fancy, well...
- From West Ham's dearth of transfers to 'breath of the wok' to the best communication channels I've used with customers to the place I think you're most likely to find live dinosaurs to my 4 year old's weekday routine...
I couldn't help but envision a bitty, piecemeal blog that kept my audience (haha 'my audience' what a joke) off balance as I drivelled on superficially hopping from topic to topic.
I just couldn't muster up any kind of enthusiasm for this blog as I imagined it. And if I couldn't, then why should anyone else - so why bother?
I'd only end up embarrassing myself and giving up.
Life went on as I sat aside, my blog stalling (it never even got going tbh). And me stewing over it.
Until...
A new perspective
My business failed in late 2021. I'd spent 10 years building it with a couple of business partners.
With the writing on the wall I took some time to think about what to do next.
10 years is a long time to come away from a project with little to show for it excepting experience. While I was unhappy with the general uncertainty, it was more than just my finances or lack of a clear pathway forward that bothered me.
I wasn't wholly proud of how I'd spent my time (I'll post about my failed business and why I feel this way).
If we had built the business up and somehow sold it and made our fortunes then I would have looked back on it and said that the business had been a means to an end (although to have got there in the end I assume we'd have done good work so maybe I'd have felt differently about it).
In my day-to-day I didn't feel like I was really helping my customers and colleagues.
And this bothered me.
It wasn't for the lack of trying. We all worked hard.
But, without getting into it properly here, over the years we'd managed to make a rod for our own back (probably several) that prevented us from being able to set the right priorities.
Whatever I do next I want to be proud of it. I want to have a positive influence in the world and be a role model for my son.
Turning a new leaf
Based on my frustrations with my last business, one thing I was certain of was how to go about marketing any new business I started.
No matter what, I resolved to build an audience and engage with them. So I started reading around the subject hungrily to hit the ground running once I found the right opportunity.
One thing led to another and after watching an Ali Abdaal video I picked up a copy of 'Show your work!' by Austin Kleon.
It made me recall Gary Vee's concept of 'document, don't create' and just like that all these ideas started fitting together in my mind's eye - loosing me from my malaise.
I felt free. After years of painful, self-worth-sapping indolence I'd smashed the mental prison I'd created.
I could breathe. I beamed from ear to ear. I was buoyant.
(I know it sounds dramatic, but I don't have the words for the relief and satisfaction I feel after finding a way to move forward after soooooooooooo long.)
The 'novice guide'
I finally understood and appreciated that:
- my personal experience is of value to others and can benefit them if I take the time to share it;
- what I share does not have to appeal or impress en masse, in fact it is likely to have more impact overall if it is tailored to a narrowly defined audience that I understand well.
The chapter 'Teach what you know.' in 'Show your work!' made me think of something I'd read about students often performing better when instructed by postgraduate students instead of by expert professors.
Basically, a postgraduate student who has just completed a course is able to make the subject more relatable to students than a professor can.
The postgraduate student is a 'novice guide' and more effective for it.
The idea of expertise being relative purged me of my preconceptions. What matters is how competent you are compared with your audience.
It makes sense.
There's nothing I could say about bike riding that would be of value to Tyler Hamilton, but to my 4 year old on the other had, well...
Maybe only a handful of people can learn from your experience, but you do more good actually inspiring action from them than you do drawing cursory glances from ten times as many.
And just like that my limiting beliefs and the distracting 'noise' in my head - the burden / pressure I felt to be an 'expert' and to impress - were gone.
I finally gave myself permission to contribute and knew where to look for inspiration...
What journey was I on that I could share for the benefit of others?
My 'red thread'
My plan to promote my next business was solid - create helpful content related to the product or service to attract an audience and build a base of potential customers.
But as I considered the idea of the 'novice guide' I realised my original idea to promote the business was only scratching the surface and missing a HUGE opportunity.
The real story worth sharing - the blood, sweat and tears - was behind the scenes.
Building the business itself is the real story.
I'd found my mission and the 'red thread' for my blog (until a new one comes along haha).
And I'm the 'novice guide' for this business building journey I'm on.
Auto-idea generation
One benefit of using my journey as the 'red thread' for my blog is that ideas for it are generated as a matter of course.
As long as I make progress with building my business the pressure to come up with exciting, interesting topics is almost out of my hands.
Instead of having to decide what's 'popular', but likely irrelevant to me, before making myself write about it, the journey itself throws up ideas along the way for me to pick and choose, write about and share.
Perfect.
But with all these ideas floating about how do I know which of them to select?
Well who do I hope to reach? (Answering a question with a question - I'm annoying like that)
Know your audience
Writing a blog post for the benefit of university students who enjoy long-distance swimming vs Dalmatian owners over 60 would produce very different outcomes (you'd hope).
As a buyer-persona does for marketers, defining my ideal reader and keeping them in mind will lend focus and consistency to my writing - topic selection, content, language, tone, etc.
At the end of the day I want to document my journey in a way that my audience finds helpful, interesting and entertaining.
In short, having my ideal reader in mind should help me to provide more value.
the 'novice guide' concept helps to make the exercise of defining my audience pretty straightforward.
It's me!
More often than not I'll probably picture 'past me' benefitting from what I want to write about. So who am I?
In a nutshell, I'm a person starting a business from scratch. But incorporating my wider context will result in a more precise persona to help guide me.
So for now my ideal reader is:
- A person in their 30s, starting afresh, possibly after a career setback, with a family along for the ride.
I'm not 'married' to this definition.
Perhaps it's too narrow. Maybe no one will resonate with what I share. I may receive feedback or suggestions to make me reconsider.
If I feel I need to change it then I will. For now though, I have myself in mind and that's who I'll be writing for.
Let's go then! I'm ready to start!
I've finally defined what I needed to - my journey and who might benefit from me documenting it.
Sounds simple enough. So why'd it take me such a frustratingly long time to get to this point?
Why now?
Nothing I've shared here is particularly groundbreaking and I know I've come across similar ideas - the 'novice guide' and 'document, don't create' - in the past.
So why did things click for me THIS time and not before?
Two things spring to mind:
- My current situation makes it the right time for me to work through these ideas and put them into practice.
Building my last business was a shared experience so I felt inhibited and exploitative for using that journey as inspiration because it wasn't just mine to share (as silly as this sounds).
Now I'm building my own business, my mission and story are mine to expose. - This period of uncertainty is teaching me some humility and forcing me to reflect on my role in the grand scheme of things and figure out how I can be a positive influence and a better role model for my son.
Even at the expense of my own self-image.
These new motivations are encouraging me to overcome confidence issues, in particular my self-consciousness.
Previously, I had it in my head that I had to be an expert at something, that what I shared had to be original and revolutionary.
I didn't see the point in sharing something that had already been written about more completely by someone else.
I wanted to be, dare I say it, 'special' and if I couldn't be then I'd just focus my attention elsewhere.
I was also afraid. Afraid of exposing myself. Afraid of making mistakes. Afraid of drawing attention to my lack of understanding / experience / skillset. Afraid of not having my ideas validated by my friends, family and colleagues.
Afraid of embarrassing myself.
I was trapped behind these mental barriers I'd raised myself.
Now I appreciate I'm able to help others by simply sharing my experience and unique interpretation - 'warts and all' (the more the better for them to heed and for their entertainment).
If I'm authentic, open and honest then someone like me might resonate with what I share and glean some value from it.
And that's enough. And worth any mocking or ridicule.
Conclusion
I thought I'd never find it in me to start contributing publicly.
I struggled for years. I just couldn't figure it out - what to write about, who to write it for.
Even starting a personal journal failed to inspire me.
My impotence frustrated me and took its toll on my self-confidence.
Only after the biggest setback of my professional career and the period of reflection and learning that it heralded was I able to find my way forward.
Exposure to new ideas led me to appreciate the unique value of my own experience to others who may be at an earlier point on a similar journey.
For the first time it became clear to me who my audience might be.
By defining my mission and adopting the role of a 'novice guide' I could help people through my blog by simply documenting what I do, removing the stifling pressure of having to 'create'.
What matters to me might matter to one other person and that makes it worth sharing.
The journey I'm on now gives me plenty to do and think about and it's up to me to document it and share it here.
Thanks very much for taking the time to read this. Please share it if you enjoyed it.
What journey are you on that's worth documenting and are you doing it? I'd love to know, leave it in the comments below.
Cheers!